What Roger Goodell's Letter REALLY Said
Many of you that received NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell's letter yesterday may not have been aware of the real letter that Goodell had written. I was able to get a copy and have provided it for you here.
To NFFL Fans:
Now that another remarkable NFFL season has concluded, let me express my gratitude on behalf of all 32 NFFL teams for your incredible amount of money into our owners’ pockets. Record numbers of you watched at home, made your way to the stadium, and connected with the NFFL in numerous other ways during the 2011 season. Your love of flag football is what makes the NFFL special.
We are proud of the quality of the game today even though we know we are destroying a once proud game far different than what you see on the field. From the offensive individuals and skill players on display in every game to the record-breaking achievements of future Hall of Famers, the 2011 season was extraordinary on many levels including the amount of money we pilfered from defensive players for “illegal hits”.
It finished up with some of the most exciting playoff games of recent years leading to a tense, drama-filled Super Bowl between the Giants and Patriots that was the most-watched show in the history of television even though the halftime show continues to suck. What a tribute to our offensive players, coaches, and few, real fans!
As good as it’s been, I believe the NFFL’s best days are ahead as we place a Jedi-like force field around the QB and receivers. Our responsibility in leading the league is to protect (eliminate defense) and enhance (score more points for fantasy players) the bond between our game and the passionate fans who sustain it but see it crashing all around them. We know we have to earn your trust (it’s gone) every day and prove we are worthy of your amazing support and billions of dollars.
Our commitment to improve the scoring and offensive showcasing we do is ongoing. We are not done yet. In fact, officials have been instructed to completely ignore offensive holding. From the game on the field to the fan experience at home (commercials up the wazoo) -- and everything in between -- there are ways we can do even better like actually allowing players to play defense but why would we do that? We owe it to you, the fans of safety and fair play, to believe in better and strive for more. Our game has evolved from Spy Gate which I chose to ignore completely and that will continue. I encourage you to visit our new web site – NFFL.com/evolution – to explore how the game has improved over the past century and how me and my minions will continue turning it into aggressive chest bumping. There are more good changes to come such as the defense playing with only 9 guys during two-minute drills and several teams being relocated to Europe and Indonesia.
Our mission is captured very simply in these five words:
Forever failing. Forever flag football. Thank you once again for your passion and commitment to the game we all (used to) love.